In October 2009, my husband received the news that his name was to be added to the Heart Transplant list. Excited, scared, nervous were among the feelings racing in my head and heart at the moment. There were some guidelines which must be met during this task of our lives.
He had to lose weight. He currently weighed 287 pounds. How on earth can he get down to the 250 which was required to get him a heart? We had test after test to go through, blood work, meeting with a psychologist (who in my opinion was a quack - and I still do not agree with, but he was only one element to the approval process), then the board met to discuss his options.
We got the announcement that we are on the list. YEAH! Now what?
Well, for one, I was not confident in the Cardiologist which we were currently seeing. Thanks for friends who are nurses and can give personal doctor opinions and knew who we should go to. (I do not think this friend knew we were on the Transplant List.) So, we jumped to the new Cardiologist. He was not only a Cardiologist, but an all around great doctor. He put it down on paper HOW TO LOSE WEIGHT, without being 100% active, since my husband does not have the energy to do full blown exercise. Miracles DO happen! We got down to 239 pounds. YEAH! The excitement in my husband voice and mind. We bought bicycles and were able to do some biking. We spent time together doing these things. Still maintaining the medication therapy and all. Still working for the most part.
To date, we are not able to go riding our bicycles, he can not go without extreme pain. Since November, he has gained a lot of fluid weight and can not get rid of it. He is in constant mental anguish with why is he not able to knock this bloated feeling?
So many thoughts on the mind, so many questions! I know my husband does not really weigh 260 pounds today, I know it is fluid built up on the heart. Last week, we went to the hospital and had an x~ray done, his heart is currently the size of a basketball.
Please Lord, hear our prayers, hear my friends prayers, allow me to feel comfort knowing that you will protect my family. I know you are an awesome God, and that I must endure pain to grow, but I really am worried and scared and unsure at this very moment. Give me a sign that you are here, and that my husband is worth every ounce of energy I put into him! I am grasping for air as I hold onto the positive that I know is here. But where o where is it?
Kids are also feeling stress from not having me home a lot, since I am between home and hospital. I try to spend valuable time between both places, giving nurturing love to all in the family. Church has been great in helping where they can, bringing over meals, helping clean, watching my girls, you name it, they are helping me with it. Thank you ladies, because your love is showing me the peace and Spirit of the Lord, which I need right now!
Things are looking better, today. His doctor called in a prescription to help release some fluids. I was told that if this does not work, then we are back in the hospital, once again. It is time for another Right Heart Catheter done. This is done every 6 months, to calculate any changes in the heart disease. After talking with the transplant team, they indicated that the heart valves leaking fluids indicate the disease taking its toll on the heart, and it is very possible that we are in more dire need to receive a heart.
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